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| Author | Topic: Beast Wars Meets Martha Stewart |
| Miss Special |
posted 5/27/03 2:39 AM
In case you didn't know, this is the second in the Swirly Blue-Purple Series, which is mostly written for my enjoyment. BTW, did ANYONE read Beast Wars Meets Dungeons and Dragons? I've recieved absolutely no feedback on it, and I'm starting to wonder if it exsits. *shrugs* Whatever. Anyways, this isn't finished yet. And it was intended to be stupid. --------------- Beast Wars Meets Martha Stewart -------------- Author's note: Figured I'd take a break from Breath of Fire V to bring you all this bit of insanity. That and my little brother wanted to play on the PS2... This wasn't inspired by the made for TV movie "Martha, Inc." that was on recently. It didn't even provide fodder for this. It was a bad movie. And, for those of you who think I'm mean, WELL, DUH! Actually, this isn't really slamming on Martha Stewart so much as the absurdity of her show. ---------------------- Disclaimer: Martha Stewart is property of Martha Stewart, at least as I write this, and the same goes for Christopher Walken *shudder* ------------------------ Optimus is sitting at his computer, playing a game that is actually a ripped-off version of Tetris. Since he's on level 11, he frantically pushes buttons, trying to get the high score. Rattrap walks in, which makes Optimus look up from his game, so he loses. Optimus: Slag!! Rattrap, what do you want? Rattrap: Dere's a funky storm brewin' outside. Rhinox says it might be the same kind of storm dat sent me an' Cheetor to that wacko Dungeons and Dragons place. You're needed in da control room. Optimus: *sigh* Fine. I'll be out in a moment. Rattrap leaves. Optimus goes back to his game, ignoring the fact that a swirly blue-purple portal has opened up behind him. It begins to suck him in, and by the time he realizes what's going on, it's too late. The portal closes behind him. -------------------- Optimus is lying facedown on a lawn in front of a white house. Someone: Hey! Get off the lawn! Optimus sits up and looks around. A human is staring at him. Human: Don't you know whose house this is? This is Turkey Hill, home of Martha Stewart! (Optimus looks confused) Oh, whatever! Say, would you like to be a guest on her show? One of the other guests cancelled at the last minute, so all we have is Christopher Walken. *shudder* Optimus: Sure? Human: Great! I'll take you to the studio! -------------------- Later, at Martha Stewart's studio... Martha: Today we have a special guest cook, Optimus Primal. What are we making, Optimus? Optimus: (peeling bananas) We're making bananas! (holds a banana up to Martha) Martha: Oh, I love bananas. Sometimes I use them to make banana ice cream. To make banana ice cream, you need fifty bananas, preferably peeled and chopped, cream, milk, sugar, vanilla, salt, and ice. I like to get my bananas from a quaint little pathside shop in the middle of Tahiti. The people at that shop are so friendly! Optimus: Well, all the bananas are peeled. Martha: And here are all the other ingredients. Now, prepare your ingredients, like so... (note from Miss Special: come on! I'm not gonna write down the entire recipe for ice cream!) And then put them in this authentic antique ice cream maker. Put the ice and salt around the ice cream and turn the crank 5,000 times. Then you'll have homemade banana ice cream! It's a good thing. Optimus: Couldn't we have just gotten some from the store? (Martha glares at Optimus) -------------------- Commercials!!!: Some Guy: Miss Special's having a special on Smacks Upside the Head! Get yours now for only five dollars a smack! *THWACK!!* Ow! That hurt! Miss Special: Get yours while the gettin's good! ---------------- Um....... Ta-da? Was this funny to any of you in the slightest? I think it is, but then again, I'm the one writing it... http://geocities.com/miss_special2000 Miss Special's Not-so-Special Site |
| Pacerpaw |
posted 5/27/03 5:22 AM
*lol* I think it was amusing, Miss Special. I don't know much of Martha Stewart but i think i have seen her guest star in a show or two. Heh have you thought about including the others in this as well? That would be so cool. :-) http://www.geocities.com/pacerpaw/index.htm BW and G1 fics, profiles etc. |
| Sapphire |
posted 5/28/03 9:07 PM
Yeah, bring in Rattrap! LOL! I know a *little* bit about Martha Stewart. Know the name, and that's it. Bit I liked it nonetheless. Martha sounds like Felicia (A South African TV show presenter) Anyway, *I* thought it was funny, and it had inspired me to read the Dungeons and Dragons fic, which I didn't read before purely because I don't know what Dungeons and Dragons is. (I think it is a game...right?) >Sapphire< http://sapphire15.yoll.net Sapphire's Beast Wars Website |
| Miss Special |
posted 5/29/03 1:11 AM
Dungeons and Dragons is a combination board game and RPG, and is INCREDIBLY customizable. It can be played with as many people as you can handle, but you need one person to be the Dungeon Master, who is all-powerful. I haven't played in awhile since my brother moved away, and he had all the books. http://geocities.com/miss_special2000 Miss Special's Not-so-Special Site |
| Sapphire |
posted 5/30/03 10:49 AM
Ahhh. Thanks for the info! I'll know a little about it when I read it. :) >Sapphire< http://sapphire15.yoll.net Sapphire's Beast Wars website |
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