|
| Author | Topic: LAPoopSoccer.cum Game Summary |
| Coach |
posted 4/22/02 3:13 PM
4-0 Drubbing Weather: temperature around 80, west winds 15 mph, partly cloudy One of the best days weather-wise of the year set the stage for the third game of the Spring season for LapoopSoccer.com. The near-perfect weather may have been a foreshadowing of the near-perfect play of our opponent, Fahrenheit. Outskilled and playing above our division, LaprepSoccer.com started the first half. The first 45 minutes were controlled by http://www.angelfire.com/sports/Fahrenheit/ with crisp and accurate passing. LapoopSoccer.com soon figured out that they weren’t in Kansas anymore. LaPoopSoccer.com’s “surpassing speed” of their defense was somehow surpassed on numerous occasions—allowing the opponent to pressure the goal several times with serious threats. In the 22nd minute 14 seconds and .68 milliseconds mark of the first half, team Fahrenheit netted it’s first goal. Jason Lyngaas took control of the ball as LaPoop (French derivative meaning “the poop”) players took notes. For more detail on this goal, see your notes. At approximately 19:33:05:45 Zulu time, the Platinum Prince of Ping scored the defending state champs second goal. Bo Wims found the back of the net on one of his patented “Got ‘em” corner kicks. All the Lapoopsoccer.com goalkeeper could attempt to do was just that—make an attempt to save the swirling shot. The goal was a backbreaker, as there were only 12 minutes left in the half. It was obvious that this was not enough time for Lapoop to enter into the opponent’s half. Although the pace remained in favor of Fahrenheit, no goals were scored for the remainder of the half. Lapoop, on the other hand, was content to go in the half behind by only two goals. Although Lapoopsoccer.com was accustomed to halftime deficits of one goal, this TWO goal deficit seemed too great. After the team held a halftime vote, it was decided that they would, in fact, NOT forfeit the game and would try and play better the second half. However, it seemed as if the fates of the gods were against them. I mean, after all, our half had all types of sand pockets and ruts, etc...How could a team be expected to play in these types of conditions?? For team Fahrenheit, the scoring barrage continued in the second half when the big hand was at 2 and the little hand was between 8 and 9 on the referee’s watch. Kyle “Strawberry Shortcake” Levert scored an incredible goal—one that even rivals those of the infamous SELASA league. The one touch rip near the corner of the 18 banked off the upper post and sent Lapoop’s defense quivering into fear. Levert had a hard time making it back to the kick-off circle due to the flooding of Lapoop players that wanted his autograph. Jason “Does a bear poop in the woods?” Lyngaas made sure to point out to one Lapoop player that he had just witnessed video 3 of today’s clinic. Down by 3 goals to a half-asleep and hungover Fahrenheit, Lapoop’s state of confusion became very evident as one of their players attempted to play volleyball. The referee rightly blew his whistle and had to explain to Lapoop about the rules of soccer and how field players can not use their hands. Once this was done (it took about 3 minutes), the ref made the Lapoop players line up around the 18 as Fahrenheit’s Platinum Prince prepared to take the PK. Feeling sorry for his fellow man, Bo Wims kicked the ball almost directly at the keeper. However, the keeper was unable to stop the shot. Fahrenheit’s tally was now at 4 goals and they began to think ahead to next week’s game. As the final whistle blew, Fahrenheit’s sweeper, Phil “Horselover” Atkinson, volunteered to go wake up his “average” keeper from his deep slumber. After being informed of how the second half went, Adam “So, you think you’re fast?” Ashe met the Lapoop players at midfield to shake hands. It was quite funny to see their perplexed faces—neither party had seen each other during the 90 minute contest at all. http://www.geocities.com/laprepsoccer/roster.html Satisfied Customers of the Fahrenheit Clinic |
|
|